I am, to put it mildly, a creature of routine. Of habit. I swear I walk the same path in my apartment every night when I am getting dinner together, or getting on the couch to read after a long day. It’s very easy for me to set routines and habits – and very hard for me to break them.
Or so I thought.
I’ve had major health challenges in the past, and latched onto control of exercise and diet as a way of managing my health-related anxieties. One way I controlled things was by keeping a careful eye on my steps (on my original FitBit) and now my calories burned (Activity) on my Apple Watch.
And I hated it. I hated that I felt compelled to check on my calories burned multiple times throughout the day.
And that I felt like a failure, or that I hadn’t “earned” what I wanted to eat, if the number was “too low”.
Let me just pause to say that I managed to easily break the habit I had of weighing myself daily when I wanted to.
But for some reason I though this would be harder, maybe because the Watch is always with me?
Anyway. The other day I had enough. I just said that I would be able to check it 3 times a day, and no more, and then I’d reassess and see if I could get it down to 2.
I started Monday. I checked 3 times on Monday and was pretty proud of myself. Yesterday? Twice.
I’m hoping today will be even better.
So yeah, I guess when I’m ready, I can actually do this. I can’t quite figure out how to apply this in more areas of my life – yet – but I am a bit more hopeful now that it is a possibility. Astonishing to me that I am this old, and yet I don’t quite know myself yet.