2024 had bright spots as well as challenges…and for me, it was the year that i remembered who I am and what I love. I credit all of you with spurring me on to go back to the things that make me, me. Your comments, your suggestions, the ways in which you live your lives – all of the things I love about all of you – reminded me that yes, these were things (well, many of them) that I used to love, too.
Reading This is probably the most striking change. Friends, this was the year that I rediscovered just how much I love to read. I always thought of myself as a reader, but it fell off of my priority list, replaced by work (of course), reading and/or listening to the news, and other forms of media-related and non-media related distraction. I will have a post coming up devoted to reading, books, and my love for Libby, but suffice to say that all of the library lovers in my virtual world finally changed my mind. I activated my Libby account (I had a library card already, yay). I started looking through the books they offered. And then – the event that changed everything? (This is so random, seriously…) My mom said how much she loved the audiobook version of The Dutch House, and when I said I’d never read it, she suggested I give it a try. Friends, it changed my life. I always thought that audiobooks were Not For Me. Turns out, I was listening to the wrong audiobooks. (This perspective was also likely influenced by childhood memories of listening to a CD and/or taped version of Just So Stories, a book I find Just So Annoying, in a car trip with lifelong friends years ago.)
I loved it. And I learned that with audiobooks, I could focus on the story while doing mindless tasks. I don’t need to focus on swiffering the floor, I can listen to Tom Hanks, or Meryl Streep, read me a story. This was mindblowing. I now have a very long Want to Read tag in Libby. I have a long list of books I’ve borrowed (with some DNFs). I’ve largely stopped spending money on books (JD Robb books being the exception – Engie, we are soulmates there). I’m saving money, I’ve read more books in the past year than I thought possible, AND it’s had a positive influence on my relationship with my parents and others.
More on this in another post, but wow. What a difference it makes to start my day with an audiobook, not the headlines.
Music
I thought that listening to music was something I’d left behind when cars stopped having tape decks. Yes, I’m old. I often listen to sports radio on my way to work. It’s a short trip, it’s low (or no) stakes, plus I like sports! But a month or so ago (maybe 2?) my therapist suggested putting on classical music, or piano music (both of which I love) while I am starting my day. I scoffed (gosh, that’s a great word) but agreed to try it. Friends, it was another game changer. Some mornings, I put on George Winston and friends (thank you, Apple music). Some mornings, it’s the Highwomen, or The Chicks (if I’m feeling rebellious, ha). I sometimes put on music in the evenings, but often I just want silence. And that’s okay, too.
The point is, it’s Not The News (see “Disconnecting”, below). It’s beautiful, well, most of it. It ties me to my past. I was a Band Nerd. I played in orchestra for years. I loved music in college (who didn’t)? And then I…lost it? This reminds me of the beauty that is music, and the ways in which it can enrich our lives in ways that the NY Times headlines cannot.
Contemplation
I am working hard to make contemplation and reflection a regular part of my life, something I started right around Thanksgiving. No, I’m not yet doing yoga (sorry, Nicole). But I am making sure to have something reflection-related in my morning, before I log in to work at an unmentionable hour. I make it more special by starting my day, right now, with hot cocoa, made from scratch, and now using the Special Dark cocoa. It’s not European cocoa but any stretch, but it’s light years better (IMO) than my baking cocoa. I try to take at least 20 minutes, but some days it’s only 10 and that’s okay. This is also often paired with “background music”, which I love. It just makes the mornings better. I mean, of course. 🙂
Disconnecting
With the, um, changes (reversion?) happening in the US this month, I started trying very, very hard, to disconnect in 2024. This was a winter break-related change, to be honest. Late in the year, but shaping my current actions, too. Instead of reading every blinking article in the NY Times, I am skipping those that I just. don’t. want. to read. Or I DNF them – I do it with books, why not with articles, too? Instead, I listen to my sports podcast, or sports radio, or an audiobook. Or nothing. There’s something to be said for close-to-silence. There really is. It’s helping, I think. I’m also on Threads, and yes, it’s a Meta company, and yes, I know about the recent actions of their CEO. Sigh. That said, it’s light years better than the cesspool that is the other social network that I Shall Not Name. So for now, I will curate my feed to focus on political liberal-leaning folks, books, libraries, space images (seriously), and other joy-bringing content. For now, it works.
Thank you for reading this far, if you’ve made it this far. 2024 wasn’t all bad. I need to remember that. Thank you all for making it better than it could have been. <3
Poet Emily Dickinson on the power of this moment: “Forever is composed of nows.”
Trying to make my nows better than they were. Be gentle with yourself, friends.