I’m not going to be able to put up the longer post on the roads I’ve traveled, but I hope to get to that this week. It really is such an interesting idea, to me, at least.

But I’ve been thinking last night and this morning about short- and long-term regret. I sometimes regret things that happened far back in my past – e.g., how I approached my college years, the groups with which I was involved, and that kind of thing.

I also have short-term regrets. Today, I have some regrets (or, maybe, have had some second thoughts?) about how I led a particular segment of my class discussion yesterday. I often revisit my approach and my interactions with students later in the day, and I came away regretting several things I said, how I’d engaged one particular student in the discussion, and the fact that we spent more time in a rabbit hole than was probably needed.

The thing is, until I receive my evals, I have no idea how students perceive these discussions and interactions. I like having positive, productive relationships with my students (fyi, this is a VERY small class, so I interact with each student individually in and outside of class). And I want to be sure that what I say supports those relationships.

So it’s hard. I think this is a function of who I am as a teacher, and who I am as a person. Social anxiety + wanting to help my students think deeply about what we discuss in class and how it will be important in their future work = a lot of perseverating. I don’t know that I will ever be one of those professors who leaves a class session and just…leaves it behind. I’m always going to want to do better, which I think is good. I just wish it didn’t come with a side of regret and second thinking.

(and before you mention it, yes, The Power of Regret is on my TBR for break. :>)

Today’s quote, courtesy of Matt Haig and Notes on a Nervous Planet: “You are you. The past is the past. The only way to make a better life is from inside the present. To focus on regret does nothing but turn that very present into another thing you will wish you did differently. Accept your own reality.”

Have a wonderful Tuesday.

I’m hoping to write a longer, more in depth post on this topic soon, but as a teaser for that…

Do you ever think about the roads or paths you have traveled to get where you are today? I find myself looking back, sometimes, and honestly wondering how on earth I landed in this life. I love my life – this is not a post lamenting lost opportunities! But it is most definitely NOT the life I envisioned for myself in high school, college, or even graduate school (the first time around).

I tend to think about my life as a winding road, one that also includes a lot of small hills and larger (mini) mountains. Have I had a difficult life? Definitely not. Have there been challenges along the way? Absolutely. Have I made choices that, in hindsight, I probably would not have made if I could do it all again? 100%.

I have a strong suspicion that this is the case for many – if not all – people. I would be shocked if I came across someone who had planned out their life in, say, high school, and then followed that path throughout their life.

So, with all that said, I’m going to leave you with this quote I love from Andrew Anabi (who writes an infrequent but lovely Substack newsletter):

“When life changes, you will probably miss the way it was. You may miss those long morning drives or walks to the office, or those hectic family gatherings. You may miss them because those moments are finite — you will only travel those streets and see those people a certain amount of times.”

Happy Monday, everyone. I know, I’m still posting daily. I am bound and determined to do 30 days in a row, since I was not aligned with the official NaBloPoMo endeavor. Feel free to ignore me. 🙂

Friends, I think I may have officially lost my mind.

Remember how I was hoping to have a calm, quiet weekend to give myself a bit of respite from the nuttiness of this time of year? While I have partially succeeded, yesterday I had the opportunity to question my sanity. Why, you ask? Well, because I honestly thought that I could go to Target at 2:45 pm on a Saturday in December, park, and get in and out with my pick up order in a reasonable amount of time.

I’ll pause while you burst into laughter.

To say that did not happen would be a tremendous understatement. I have no idea what I was thinking. None. I couldn’t find a parking space anywhere near the store (and keep in mind, this is a fairly small Target with a relatively small parking lot, compared to most suburban Targets), people were wandering in front of my car, and I was lucky to make it out of there unscathed.

Trying again this morning, then scurrying home to actually get to the “respite” portion of the weekend. Have a wonderful Sunday. I hope all of you can take a few moments for yourself, too, however you prefer to do so.

This was a nutty week, for sure. I’m coming in to the weekend grateful to have 2 days to reset, to have a bit of respite before taking a deep breath and plunging in (again) next week. I know it will be brief, so I hope to take the time I need to get some rest (literally and figuratively). I hope to catch up on the last of the NaBloPoMo posts (still forging through!) and spend some time doing things just for me. In addition to, well, catching up on the to-do list. Because let’s get real – many of the things I put on there this week were simply moved from day to day to day.

So, today, I’ll leave you with this thought from Alice Griffin (who writes a lovely Substack, which you may want to check out):

“Steadiness, slowness, appreciation, a sense of time having no hold. And silence. Silence is the order of the day. It’s easy to fear it—always rushing to fill the gaps—but silence is where beauty is for me. Within silence is where my breathing slows and my soul comes alive. In silence I am able to both meet myself and see others.”

Even if you have a bonkers weekend of kid activities and holiday things-to-do and other life stuff, I hope you get a minute or two of silence for yourself.

I would swear I just had a post with this title but a quick review shows that it wasn’t in the last month. So I think I am safe. 🙂

I am having a discombobulated morning. Nothing major has gone off the rails, but everything I have tried to do has hit a minor stumbling block. Running in to work to grab a few things for the weekend, and finding that I didn’t have something I thought I did. Forgetting to put water in the coffee maker. Being unable to install my really ancient printer on my new work laptop (which means that I cannot print at home… not the end of the world, but still…). My Outlook app not showing my many subfolders (phone app, to be clear). And, etc.

I have meetings all day, and had hoped to get a few things checked off my list before the first one at 0730. Now I’m hoping for checking one thing off.

But! Yesterday, James Clear’s 3-2-1 Thursday newsletter was a treasure trove of quotable material. I’m going to share one that I need to keep in mind at all times (and it harkens back to Engie’s mantra “of things”…):

You are not the cause of everything that happens to you, but you are responsible for how you respond to everything that happens to you. ~James Clear

I know this, I really do. But sometimes I want to rail against the universe, and I need to remember this when that happens. Because, despite my best efforts, railing against the universe has not actually done anything.

Happy Friday, and happy end-of-NaBloPoMo to the intrepid bloggers who made it through! I hope you have a weekend that strikes the balance you need to feel your best.