Happy Wednesday, everyone. (Did anyone else grow up calling it hump day? As in, the hump in the middle of the week? My parents did and I still have the term in my mind as a marker of where I am in my week. :>)

I started thinking about the communities that we have in our lives this morning – prompted by the realization that I have 3 communities that serve different purposes in my life. The mental wanderings started with thinking about support and love (of different kinds) and how I get those things from different people in my life. Communities and social networks are so critical to everyone’s well-being, I think. I see this in my research (I’ve used social network analysis in several research studies and it’s fascinating to see how other people generate and describe their networks), I see it in my life, and I see it in others’ lives.

Like I said, I have 3 communities:

• Family
• Work
• Blogging

My family includes my biological family of origin and my chosen family, which includes a random assortment of people who have been important in my life at various stages. (If you ever want to hear some interesting stories, ask people who they think of when you say the word, “family”. This was our network generator in several studies, and it’s absolutely fascinating!) My work family consists of a very small group of people whom I trust and rely on for help, support, and advice. There are people who are more senior to me, and one or two others who are at the same stage in their careers. And my blogging community includes, well, all of you. 🙂

NaBloPoMo reminds me of how much I value the community that I have found online in the past few years. I credit San for bringing us together each year, and I see the month as a celebration of the connections forged among a group of people with very different lives, who nonetheless have created a community with strong ties and mutual support. It’s a welcoming group, and an ever-evolving one.

I was wandering through a few books I own this morning, looking for a more philosophical take on community, when I came across A.C. Grayling’s description of love in his book, The Meaning of Things: “…the kinds of love that are most significant to us are not those that fill novels and cinema screens. They are instead those we have for family, friends, and comrades; for these are the loves that endure through the greater part of our lives, and give us our sense of self-worth, our stability, and the framework for our other relationships.”

I hope you all get to enjoy some time with your communities this week. <3

So, my post on clutter and trying to rid myself of it didn’t come out of the blue.

Kim had a comment on that post that nailed it: I have people who love me, whose love language is gifts. Of things, not experiences. My parents are wonderful people. Their love language is gifts. And they look for any opportunity to send me something that they think would be helpful, or fun, or useful. I love them for this, I really do. But it means that things will randomly show up in the package room from them without any warning.

Recent packages have included… unbelievably warm fleece lined leggings (that I will probably wear in January when it’s positively frigid out there), paintings (more on that to come), and now… a one-cup coffee maker.

The thing is, these 3 gifts are all useful. But, did I need them right now? Not necessarily. The leggings are nice but not necessary. The paintings could have stayed put until I did another trip out East. And the coffee maker, well I’ve been using instant and it’s been fine. So every time this happens, I go into a “I have too much stuff!” spiral. And then I feel guilty. They are showing me they love me. They absolutely love giving me things. It brings them joy.

I am trying to shift my mindset from “too much stuff” to “this is stuff I can use, and I will find a way to use it and make it work in my life. (And also store it. :>)”

What about you? Are gifts your love language (they are most definitely not mine)? Do people in your life give you gifts that are nice but not necessary?

Starting my Monday hoping to power through on caffeine and the need to get. things. done.

I’m staring down the last few weeks of the semester (um, four? I think there are four after this week?) and realizing just how bonkers it’s going to be. Guest lectures. Students needing to have their materials reviewed, commented on, and returned. Meetings (of course). And sprinkled in there, my desire to go through the clutter and get rid of some of it (or at least have a plan!).

So I’m gathering my motivation and (being perfectly honest here) drinking all the caffeine. I know this isn’t good for my sleep difficulties, but needs must.

And, I’d like to take some time this week to, you know, be thankful for all I have. I love my job, and I am so lucky to have it. I think it’s going to be really important to keep that front of mind as I shift into end-of-the-semester mode. (And maybe forget, in the moment, that I actually do like what I do, ha…)

Balancing motivation, thankfulness, and caffeine. I can do this, right? (Any tips? ;>)

Not getting too deep into anything today because my will to live has been sapped by grading papers and trying to make heads or tails out of some students’ writing. My brain kind of hurts.

So instead, you get my overview of Stuff. As in, stuff and things. Literally.

I have a love/dislike relationship with stuff – and by this, I mean anything from clothing to small appliances to food to cleaning supplies… Basically, anything in my apartment that has physical dimensions and is not me.

I know I need stuff. I also know I don’t want a lot of extraneous stuff. And a lot of the time, I think I have too much stuff. But then, when I start digging into the details, I realize that a lot of it is either essential (see: food), or necessary to live a civilized life (see: cleaning supplies, also soap).

So I accept that – reluctantly – and instead focus on trying to reduce the amount of unnecessary stuff in my life. I like to think I’ve done a pretty good job, and yet… when I look around my apartment (or in my closet, or my cabinets) I feel overwhelmed with all of it. But I still can’t identify truly unnecessary things to donate and/or get rid of, much of the time. So I’m left with the feeling of overwhelm.

I’m not sure if I DO have a lot of stuff in comparison to others, or that it’s just more… compressed here? I don’t have a ton of storage space. Everything not in the bathroom or bedroom is in the same large room (kitchen, office, living room, and workout space). So a lot of it is visible All. The. Time. I’m starting to think that this visual overload is contributing to my minor sense of panic, and being overwhelmed by it all.

Not that I can change that. Which means I need to adjust my mindset, to recognize that some things are essential. Yes, I can get rid of the extras, but a lot of the time it just doesn’t make sense to get rid of things that I use regularly.

I’m hoping to upgrade some of my storage options (bins, boxes, etc.) to help with this. Of course, that means buying more stuff to organize but… I’m trying to tell myself it’ll be worth it in the end.

It will be worth it in the end, right?

Any tips for living in small spaces and keeping my mind off of All the Stuff? Please?

Happy Sunday, everyone.

Well, my no-peopling weekend is going to be challenged by running errands this morning. Eeps. I plan to go straight to self checkout, though, to avoid all possible interactions. The question is, will I pick up a lipstick at Target (some of the more makeup-savvy people reading this probably just fell over…sorry…) to try Elisabeth’s trick? I know you will be waiting with bated breath to find out. 😉

Other than that, it’s a working weekend. We do not have a Thanksgiving (or Fall) break, which means next week is the usual mishmash for me of teaching, meetings, and other things I need to check off the list.

I realized I forgot a key part of my morning routine: The parental phone call. This started a couple of summers ago, when my parents decided that they wanted to check in every morning. Why? I’m not sure. To check that I’m alive? Regardless, each morning starts with the same text message: Good morning. Call when you can. Love you. (Sometimes I mix it up and use heart emojis instead of saying “love you”, LOL.) And then we talk for anywhere from 5-20 minutes. I usually get the weather report from where they live, as well as a run down of their days, and I look up goofy local news and share it with them. I figure, I don’t live with anyone, I don’t really have any breakfast conversation, so this is a small thing to do and honestly? It makes me happy. I know I won’t be able to do this forever, so I treasure each of these moments of mini-connection.

It’s kind of like the random texts you get from people just popping up to ask a question, or say hi. For me, at least, there’s a little burst of joy when I see that someone has, apparently, thought of me, and let me know. Even for the introvertiest of introverts, those mini-connections matter.

I hope you get the chance to have some mini (or not so mini!) connections this weekend and, for those in the US, next week. I know you all treasure them as much as I do, maybe even more.

(Well, this went down an unanticipated path, but… I guess that’s what you get when you title a post “Saturday Randomness”! Happy Saturday, my friends.)