Relief, Sadness, Frustration, Fatigue

I have been saying this for weeks here at work, but man, it’s been a week.
I guess I need to change and say man, it’s been a month. And the only way it’s going to get better is to just get through it, again.

Nonstop meetings. Deadlines and stress and students and interviews and decisions and the whole mishmash of things that come with being in academia.

Yesterday was like a condensed version of the last month.

  • Today (Wednesday) I was supposed to be on a plane to California. The conference was canceled, thanks to COVID-19. I was disappointed but also, honestly, relieved. I do love staying home and while I’m disappointed that I won’t get to network and learn more about research being done by others who share my interests, I suspect they’ll find a way to help us interact and learn more from what should have / would have been presented.
  • Sadness. I also had to cancel a trip out East next week, which was for dual purposes, seeing my parents, and getting a long-awaited medical consult. But given the current COVID-19 situation, and the fact that my university actually asked people to refrain from leaving the county if they didn’t have to do so, plus my provider’s recommendation that I not travel (due to the condition for which I was getting the consult), plus my parents’ reluctance to have me expose myself to potential infection, well, it was kind of a no-brainer of a decision. But oh, I’m still so sad. While yes, part of the trip was the consult, the real reason I really wanted to go was to see my parents. They’ve had some major challenges this winter, and I just wanted to see them in person, hug them, and make sure they’re okay. (Or as okay as they can be…) Sigh.
  • Frustration. Ha. This one makes me laugh at myself, but I get so frustrated with a colleague who uses weird and unnecessary abbreviations in emails. Really, you can’t spell out “committee”? It takes you that much longer to type than “Ctte.” (Note the period, and also? I don’t get the two t’s. I’d do it “cmte”, but I also, um, wouldn’t abbreviate it. I also abbreviate the entire name of the committee as the “CC”.) Anyway, it’s such a small thing, but every time I read one of her emails, I get twitchy. Fortunately, it also makes me realize how ridiculous I am, and then I laugh at myself. 
  • And fatigue. Good grief, I’m getting old, but the time change on Sunday seems to have hit me like a ton of bricks. I’m sleeping hard, and I’m so, so ready to get in bed when bedtime rolls around that I can hardly keep my eyes open. I’m hoping this move on soon. 
On to another day of meetings meetings meetings + class. My parents wonder what I do all day? This: Meetings at 8, 9:30, 11, 12, and then 2 hours of class teaching at 2. Oh, and working on my “own stuff” in there too. Ha. 
Onward. Upward. Time to persevere and push on. 
Image result for quotes on perseverance
(fortunately, I have no shortage of stubbornness)

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